Capital Furs

Ripped off my DA account. Posting it here so people can enjoy.

Every person has a candle in them.
This candle is the light inside of them.
It is the warmth in there soul,
The courage in there chest,
The love in there heart.
This candle keeps them warm on cold nights,
And company on lonely days.

It makes everything better when they're feeling sad,
And lights up there day when they need it most.
But best of all,
It can be shared with others

Shared to light others sadness when there candle is to dim
Shared to spread the warmth to them.
Shared to help them with courage when they need it most.
It's an amazing thing.. till you lose it.

When that someone leaves you.. And blows away the flame
You start to feel colder every day
What's left of your courage diminishes
And you have no company anymore.
Your heart seems to beat slower every day.
You find yourself unable to do things you once used to love doing.
Nothing in life makes you happy..
And you drift away from the world..

But you hold out.
Hold out, hoping that one day..
You'll find someone else..
To relight your candle with there own..
And make everything warm and happy again..
But until that moment, you must suffer.
Almost everyone goes through this..
And one day, it'll be your turn..

So be sure to be careful who you share your flame with.
That they're not going to leave you on the first chance
and that you spend every moment trying to make them happy
Because once your flame goes out once, it's never the same
That first time..
Is never the same..

I'd write a solid and in-depth critique of this, but to be honest I'm not a huge fan of poetry that doesn't rhyme. I never know how to approach it, and it comes off reading more like an essay on the person's thoughts than a poem.

That's just me of course and I'd rather someone with more interest in freeform poetry tell you how it is since I know nothing about it xD

I will say though, in this case 'there' should be 'their'.

Not laughing at you at all. Promise. Just trying to help.

Meer wrote:I'd write a solid and in-depth critique of this, but to be honest I'm not a huge fan of poetry that doesn't rhyme. I never know how to approach it, and it comes off reading more like an essay on the person's thoughts than a poem.

That's just me of course and I'd rather someone with more interest in freeform poetry tell you how it is since I know nothing about it xD

I will say though, in this case 'there' should be 'their'.

Not laughing at you at all. Promise. Just trying to help.

Yeah, The spell checker I used sucked. Plus, I wrote it in tears, so I wasn't exactly thinking straight. I do have a poem that DOES rhyme however on my DA account.
http://tudeslildude.deviantart.com/art/ ... -140776147
Enjoy~

---